How we experience our world is determined by our thoughts about people and events in our lives. When someone criticizes us, we can choose to take it to heart or we can choose to allow them their opinion and leave it at that. We continually choose what to think. We can let our thoughts ramble on out of control heading toward fear and self doubt or we can choose calming, happy, uplifting, freeing thoughts. Our thoughts are so closely related to our feelings that when we change our thoughts we change our feelings and our life experience.
There are endless choices but I feel the most damaging choice we make is to be swayed by the big "S" word. It originates in the mind rather than in the heart so there's a clue that it might not be the best choice. Heart choices come from a place of well-being, from a place of connection to your highest good. More often than not we are continually making choices between a head choice and a heart choice. The big "S" word is "should". "I should get into work early to appear highly productive", "I should do what my partner expects", "I should volunteer for that project" and on it goes all day every day. The word should, immediately places you in a place of negativity and all choices made from that place do not serve your best interest.
I believe the feeling the word "should" evokes is very destructive. It conjures guilt and restriction and resentment, all of which are strong negative emotions. These negative emotions develop patterns within us that prevent inspiration and all that is good from flowing to us to help us achieve all the wonderful abundance we deserve.
It is the choices we make on a continual basis everyday that sculpt our world. When you make choices from a place of a loving, giving, open heart space, you allow your world to reflect that back to you. Likewise the opposite will occur. Negative, restrictive thought patterns will attract experiences of that nature. This is a world of attraction and that which you focus on will increase. Therefore it is your best interest to stay focused in loving place as much as possible.
Well how do I choose between two things when I don't want either of them I hear you ask? Good question. This is when you call on your understanding of consequences to help. You can turn all choices around to come from a place of "I choose" rather than "I feel forced" which is what "should" is all about. When you understand that you are making the choice and you are not being forced by anyone, you realize that you are acting form an empowered place that is open to great potential for good things to happen.
Here's an example of how to eliminate a should. Consider you have two choices, but either one will make someone unhappy. The trick is to choose the one you feel makes you feel the best. There are always consequences of our actions so choose the decision that has the consequences you feel you can best live with.
Your dialogue might go something like this.
I feel obligated to do"X" but if I do this thing I will be totally miserable and the whole event will be a disaster. If I don't do "X" then the other person will feel bad but I will feel relief.I will feel upset for making the other person feel bad but my sense of relief of not doing "X" will out weigh my sadness.
Or
I don't want to do "X ", but if I do "X" the other person will feel bad and this will hurt me more than if I did "X" so I choose to do "X".
On the surface it may appear that you feel you have no choice but that is never the case. Many decisions may seem illogical and inappropriate when you start honoring what feels right for you, but I believe in the long run if you are at peace with your decisions all will be well.
There will always be one choice that you believe to be the least painful. It maybe that others will disagree with your choices but the key is you have to feel it is the one best for you. Make the choices from what feels right in your heart, not what appears to be logical. It may sound obvious but once you start listening to the "shoulds" in life you will muffle the internal guidance you have that points you in the direction of what is best for your own happiness.
Some of you may think that this is a shallow and even selfish way to approach life. But consider this, negative emotions will create negative events and positive emotions will create positive events. It is not within our power to know how the Universe will bring these positive changes into our lives but it is true that sometimes it is more healthy and takes more courage to say no to a "should" than is does to give in to it. When you act from love you know you are acting from the right place. Sometimes the hardest thing is to act with love toward yourself and not surrender to the big "S".
Increase your happiness level and you will be well on your way to enjoying Advanced Success in all areas of your life as what you give your attention to will surely multiple.
Happily
Gaynor
Gaynor Parke is CEO of Advanced Success Life Coaching and believes "you are the key to your success". With over 25 years of Personal Development study and vast business knowledge Gaynor is well equipped to assist people in all walks of life
Clients can achieve increased confidence, relationship and communication skills, reduced stress, greater clarity when faced with life's challenges, more vitality and zest for life plus a sense of peace and contentment.
Join Gaynor's Inspiration Lounge on her website and receive fortnightly coaching tips absolutely FREE plus her FREE EBook on entitled "8 Powerful Steps To Make a More Successful Life"
With a MONEY BACK GUARANTEE and FREE introductory session you have every reason to contact Gaynor today at http://www.advancedsuccesslifecoaching.com.au.
0 comments:
Post a Comment