Seven Keys to Goal Success - what you need to know to achieve life-changing, mind-blowing dreams!
"Dear Coach,
I take lots of time setting my goals; every year I sit down and write them out just like I have read that I should do - but at the end of the 12 months I am disappointed when I look back and see how few of them I have failed to achieve - it's depressing and I feel like I am getting nowhere with my dreams. I don't get it... I write them down but nothing seems to work out - what am I doing wrong. I feel that life is passing me by and I never get any closer to my dreams?" From a worried client
Sound familiar to you?
It's something I have heard many times and have experienced myself - that feeling that you are getting nowhere with your dreams - It's such a common dilemma. You know that to achieve success you need to write down your goals but somehow the next step - achieving them - doesn't seem to happen. Why is it that some people achieve so many of their goals but others fail to get even the simplest plans off the ground?
They spend years going round in circles, not really moving on and not really sure of what they are trying to achieve.
Meanwhile, your friends are;
o Building exciting new businesses
o Buying great houses
o Undertaking interesting courses to improve their skills
o Taking action to find a new partner
o Overcoming fears
o Getting better jobs
o Running marathons
o Taking fabulous overseas trips
And the list goes on.... it makes you feel worthless, depressed, unmotivated and stuck in a rut. It just doesn't seem fair does it? Maddening!
What do they have that you don't?
The answer is NOTHING apart from the fact that they have unlocked the secret to setting and achieving their goals and they go for it with passion and commitment. In short - they are 'fair dinkum' about what they want to achieve!
Real goal setting - it's a passion of mine and has been since I was a little girl when each New Years eve I would take stock of the year gone by writing lists of what I had done and what my favourite things were at that age and by making up little books full of magazine pictures of what I wanted my life to be like in the future. I had fun doing it and really enjoyed thinking about all the wonderful things that were available to me as I poured over my little 'vision books'.
Fast forward to 2003, when I was working my way through a divorce and bringing up a one year old alone as a stay-at-home mother. After a couple of years of going nowhere, just licking my wounds and recovering, I decided to undertake a new program of goal setting - serious goal setting where I dreamed big and committed it all to paper with deadlines. In the December of 2009 I am proud to say I ticked off the last of those goals as I excitedly enrolled my daughter in one of Melbourne's top private schools. Every goal I had identified had come true, and they weren't all that straight forward. From having a fabulous new husband (and I had written a long, detailed list of my requirements for him, not at all an easy find!) to driving a Mercedes Benz and having a top job - every one of my dreams had come to fruition through my strong beliefs and positive thinking AND most of all my actions to ensure that I was heading toward the achievement of what I wanted. And I was starting from scratch, let me tell you, living in regional Victoria, driving a Toyota and working in a casual role for a small local business.
And it is my belief that no matter what you dream you can make it come true as long as you have the right ingredients in the mix and follow the seven steps you must take to achieve your goals without fail! I also refused to believe that I would not have what I wanted. I TOTALLY BELIEVED that what I wanted would come to me.
And you can do it too - I have seen many fantastic clients discover their gifts and make enormous changes in their lives due to the goal setting process to bring their more joy and contentment - but enough of the talk.... Now it's time for you to live the life you were born to lead as you learn the secret to setting and achieving awesome goals!
Right now you can learn the 7 steps to goal setting success and you too can craft the strategies you need to achieve whatever you want - from the simplest goals (e.g. cleaning up the spare room or starting a basic fitness regime) to the largest you can imagine (becoming an elite athlete, starting the business you dream of, getting that amazing job)
If you want to lead a fabulous life hitting all the highlights you are after you must change the way you construct and implement winning strategies and actions to achieve your desires - your goals. If you do make these changes and take on this new way of thinking then you will achieve an outstanding quality of life because you will learn a valuable new set of skills you can use in all areas of your life. This will make your life experience far more rewarding and enjoyable which means you will live life at a higher level and EVERYONE around you will notice the change and your successes as you achieve them EVERYTIME. And you will also find you are more centred, happier and content, living with greater purpose and confidence.
And deep down isn't that what everyone wants?
And when you take yourself into the future - say a few months time, then a few years - and you imagine you can see, feel and hear the fantastic change in your life that you have made happen
Wouldn't you like to be the one that everyone else was saying 'wow' about?
Some of us are great at setting goals - we think about them and write them down and believe we take the right steps in order to achieve them; but something always prevents us from achieving them, and they stay on the list as unsatisfied dreams, just some good ideas we may have had. Stop wasting time wishing, waiting and hoping your goals with some day be reached - today is the day to get it all happening once and for all. It's your time now so get excited!
The 7 steps you must know you achieve winning goals... commit them to memory...here is where the magic starts...
1: Your goals must be SMART - more about this one below....
2: Your goals must EXCITE you -
If your goals are not exciting you will face an uphill battle to achieve them so take the time to make them really juicy! It's your life so pep it up to the max!
3: Your goals must be crafted as TOWARD goals
By this I mean they must be crafted in a way which propels you toward them - not away from something you currently dislike. For example; "I want to be a size 10 dress size" rather than 'I don't want to be fat!" State what you want always - not what you don't want! This only keeps you in the negative so your brain can't switch into helping you create what you really would like!
4: You must be able to SEE your goals as a reality
The more you can visualise your goals as a reality the more possibility there will be of making them happen. If you can't visualise take some time to close your eyes and imagine yourself experiencing your goal -how does it look, how does it feel, how does it sound? What would you be saying? What would others be saying to you? How would life look? If you have trouble doing this it will be to the detriment of your achievement. Spend some time with a coach to help you gain the skill you need here.
5: You must be HIGHLY COMMITTED to achieve them and take ACTION toward their fulfilment every day.
If you can't get off your butt to take some positive actions and make some necessary changes your goals aren't goals - they're fantasy! Stop kidding yourself and get some coaching or make a promise to yourself to get serious about this otherwise face a future of regret.
6: You must know the PURPOSE of your goal and the effect the achievement of them will have in your life.
Why do you want to achieve this? What is the purpose? You need to really feel this purpose is worthwhile - if is just a frivolous wish it is likely you won't take the right action.
7: You must remove any NEGATIVE BELIEFS about your ability to achieve this goal.
Remove all obstacles in your way - get coached if you need help.
"In life we have either the pain of discipline or the pain of regret" -
which would you prefer?
Let's look at the important task of writing up your goals in detail and the system which you need to follow for success.
Get yourself settled someplace that is comfortable and you won't be distracted - relax and enjoy creating your future... do you have a journal and pen ready?
Writing your SMART goal
You may have heard the acronym SMART before - this is a crucial component to successful goal setting but only one of the factors you need to get you success. It refers to five elements necessary to incorporate in your goal setting and they are as follows;
S stands for simple. When you write your goal out it must be simple, focussed, specific but not too wordy.
M stands for Measurable. This means you must be able to measure the achievement - how will you know when it has been achieved? What will be different in your life? What will you be feeling, doing, saying - what will you have? Where will you be? What exactly has the achievement been? For example, it's not enough to say "l want to lose weight' you need to say how much!
A is Attractive. A goal that is seen as attractive is much more motivating than one that is worked toward solely because one feels they 'should'. Your goal needs to be covetable, rewarding, exciting, fulfilling - it's got to be worth striving for otherwise it won't fire your soul!
R is for Realistic. Now don't confuse realistic here to mean something totally within your comfort zone - we want you to stretch yourself, to rise to new challenges and to pursue your dreams with vigour and excitement - you can be anything you want - if you can see it there is a good chance you can do it - however, realistic here is meant in the sense that is must be achievable. For example - don't say you want to lose 5 kilos in one week, or have a new job with double the salary within one month otherwise you may be setting yourself up for disappointment and this is not what you want! Set your goals with realistic time limits in place and room for adjustments along the way and you be sailing into success city rather than bombing out with a goal that has too restrictive conditions placed upon it.
T is Timed. Your goal needs to have a time, a date for it's completion written into it. There needs to be some urgency attached to your goal otherwise you could meander along for years just 'thinking about it' - it stays an 'idea' not an achievement you are serious about.
An example of a SMART written goal would be something along like this;
"It's now my birthday, November 2010 and I am at a restaurant with my family celebrating the success of my first year in my own fashion styling business. I have 20 new clients booked in who all appreciate my service and are happy to pay my fees of $150 per hour and on time. I am happy and I love what I do."
There are only three things you need to get anything you want in life -
1. The right mindset
2. The appropriate knowledge/education
3. Action!
It's simple when you think about it isn't it?
Firstly, you ensure you have the right positive mindset to achieve your goals - you can do anything to set your mind on, there are no obstacles in your way. Secondly you take stock of what you know to achieve your goal - you get the knowledge you need - for example if you are setting up a business you need to attain all the knowledge you can around what the requirements are for a business to operate legally, then you may need to develop marketing and staffing plans and accounting systems.
Lastly but most importantly you get off your butt and start taking the actions you have identified as crucial to the success of your goal! GO FOR IT!
So how about giving it a go right now?
1. First of all identify an area of your life that you would like to achieve - it could be a goal in your career, your health, your personal life, your finances etc.
2. Next write the goal in SMART format, thoroughly thinking through what it is that you want to achieve and how
3. Now make yourself a list of actions that you need to put in place to start moving you closer to the achievement of this goal eg; if your goal is to lose 5 kilos by next Christmas you might like to write up a special eating and exercise plan, set monthly weight goals, research the best, most suitable gyms or personal trainers, buy some new gym gear. Cut out a picture of the ideal new dress you would like to wear as you celebrate your achievement.
... Some of you may be getting wildly excited and feeling great after this exercise but there still may be some of you who are just... not... feeling... too...positive.... if that's you ask yourself now - 'Am I fair dinkum about this goal?' if this answer pops up as a 'no' - you need to ask yourself some more questions... if it's yes, congratulations - you are committed and stand a good chance of success by just following through.
Remember, the process described is key to your success as it puts you in the 'future' which effectively moves you toward your goal. It's important for you to know what you want and move toward it rather than what you don't want - which is moving away from your goal. If you are constantly writing down what you don't want you are not designing a life you can work towards - only thinking about the negatives and staying stuck in what you don't want.
If you don't identify what you want how can you expect to ever achieve it?
Ensure you are 100 per cent responsible for your life - you are totally in the driver's seat and have everything you need inside you right now to achieve your goals.
There are many valuable coaching questions you can ask yourself you help move toward achievement of your goal. Ask yourself these questions as you formulate your goals and propel yourself toward a higher success rate - you will be unstoppable!
1. How committed to this goal am I on a scale of 1 - 10
2. If I am not committed to this goal at a 10 what do I need to do to get me committed at that level? What do I need to. overcome to commit at the highest level?
3. Have I tried to achieve this before? Why didn't I succeed in the past? If there is no failure but only feedback, what feedback could I take on board with regard to my lack of success with this goal in the past? What can I learn from the past to help me with the future?
4. What are your beliefs about the possibility of attaining this goal? If you are full of negative beliefs get some coaching to help you create new positive beliefs and remove your fears - many of our beliefs about our own capabilities are a hangover from growing up - what our teacher said to us in third grade ("you'll never be good at maths), what our kindly aunt said at our 12th birthday ("you've always been a bit on the chubby side"), what our mother's said to us to protect us from hurt in our formative years ('darling, you just weren't meant to be an athlete") - many well meaning people have shaped the way we feel about ourselves - what was meant to 'protect us' could be holding us back as adults. Book a coaching session to discover the real you and the confidence to move forward in all areas of your life. An hour session can make a massive change to your future.
5. What is the purpose in my life of this goal?
6. List three benefits of achieving this goal.
7. List all the actions you need to take to achieve your goal
Some questions to motivate...
1. What will happen if you achieve this goal?
2. What will happen if you don't give it a go?
3. What are you scared of? Is the fear real?
4. What is the worst thing that could happen it you take action toward this goal?
5. What is the best thing that could happen?
6. What would someone else who has been successful in achieving goals do or say to move forward?
So now it's time to have some fun creating your exciting future - what will you do, where will you go, how will you get there? What will your life be like?
I'd love to hear how you go so let me know!
Janita Friend is a life coach passionate about improving and enriching the lives of wonderful women around the world. See her website for more information on how you can live the life you dream of. http://www.designerlives.com.au.
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